It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
