I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I stole a fireplace last night.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait