so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
