Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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