So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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