Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
