oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Come on in and take your pants off
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