Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
