I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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