i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
