Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
