Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
