jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
The feeling are messing with the penis
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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