even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
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