The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
he thought i was a dude.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
My bed smells like the plague
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize