Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
