I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
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