Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
My pussy is not your playground.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
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