I'm laying in your front yard are you home
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I love you. Go after that dick
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize
