For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
porn star boner night. come get it.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize