I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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