They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Randomize