I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
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