this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
