Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
BRING THE BAGELS
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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