wat bout pragnant strippers??
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
You're breaking my sexual little heart
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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