I just made out with a guy for $7.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
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Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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