I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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