I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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