turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I'm too high and old for this...
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
