I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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