we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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