Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
There r osticjed everywhere
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Randomize
