oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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