the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
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