Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
what day is it and did you see me today?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
