I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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