yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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