Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
