I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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