come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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