Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
