I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
