I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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