i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
wow bdsm is so cute
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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