Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
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Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
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I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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