he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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