she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
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No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
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last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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