All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send help, water and tortillas.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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