so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
