Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
